It’s been a while since I’ve been slightly inebriated and unbecomingly honest on this thing, so here goes.
I dunno, dude. I cried a little listening to Amy Winehouse earlier today - not any sort of big girl “we’ve run out of icecream” tears, but just kind of a shitty realization that I’ve seen that road she went down and that addiction is a tough thing. And as much as someone can try and overcome it, it’s a sickness that is hard to get through at any stage. Look, I wish I could just “chill” and be vaguely blasé about this news item with her. Big deal: she’s a pop singer, and by all the rules in sensibility that should not in any way mean that her death should technically affect anything directly to me. But the girl was only 27.
That’s my age.
Shit, I went through my “Bright Lights, Big City” phase. It weren’t fun. Amy had an amazing talent and that is an indisputable fact. And it’s strange, and shitty, and a whole lot of other things I won’t be able to comprehend - because, you just, don’t, because if you fully understood the whims and withdrawls of a true human you wouldn’t even be allowed to be on this strange little blue and green marble flowing through space. Shit, I know it’s a singer that died, and that’s cheeseball enough, but I sat there and watched her videos for just half an hour and when you see that level she was at and then see her downfall it shows where addiction can take you. And it’s a sobering reminder. And if you didn’t already: you need to look at addiction as a treatable disease that can be rigorously cured rather than just a petty problem or bad habit.
It’s pretty late and my bedroom is air-conditioned, so that’s my late night ramble. Do your thing, I ain’t one judge you on it.
On that note…