ned hepburn

is a 25 year old writer. i write for the Vice blog and do a couple record reviews for Bust Magazine. email me at nedhepburn AT gmail DOT com.

tv & new media agent: Brandon Martinez at Abrams Artists / / / / /

i auditioned for a production of Hedwig, many years ago. the guy made me take off my shirt and sing into a broom. afterwards, he made me tea, hugged me, and promised to call. to this day i’m still not sure if i was auditioning for the part of Tommy Gnosis or that was a first date.

i auditioned for a production of Hedwig, many years ago. the guy made me take off my shirt and sing into a broom. afterwards, he made me tea, hugged me, and promised to call. to this day i’m still not sure if i was auditioning for the part of Tommy Gnosis or that was a first date.

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 11:55am

lieslieslies:

WHO AM I?

i like her.

lieslieslies:

WHO AM I?

i like her.

Reblogged from .

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 11:45am

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Download:

Hedwig & The Angry Inch “Wicked Little Town”

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 11:38am

"If people bring so much courage to this world the world has to kill them to break them, so of course it kills them. The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it kills you too but there will be no special hurry."

- Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms (via meaghano) (via syntheticpubes)

Reblogged from syntheticpubes.

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 11:04am

Diane Savino, New York State Senator, raddest speech in the world on gay marriage.

via davidpress and robhuebel.

Reblogged from dave's notebook..

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 10:35am

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Download:

Toots & The Mayals “Louie Louie”

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 10:14am

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Dexy’s Midnight Runners “Come On Eileen”

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 10:10am

Good friends

Good friends know when to bring out the alcohol and make you feel alright.

My best friend of, like, what is it?, 8 years?, brings out the liquor cabinet and makes you two Vesper Lynd cocktails (from James Bond!!) google the drink it’s amazing, and talk about good things the rest of the night.

I dunno, man. Good times. I needed this.

Thursday, December 3rd 2009 1:31am

Rules.

#407: never play Scrabble with a pretty girl.

#407a: ‘Tazza’ is totally a fucking word.

Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 2:02pm

FIRST JOBS. 
my first real job was working at a pizza place when i was 16. they made me clean the bathrooms and then make the salads, in that order, and they blasted Papa Roach (as was the style at the time) in the kitchen. we never had any customers, and i quit after a week after they made me pay for my shift meal because “your suburban ass can afford it”.
my first job after the pizza place was at “The Gap”. it was a magical time filled with promise and khakis, vim and vigor, and sweatpants for twelve dollars and ninety nine cents. on the second day, they made me sort out the bras and panties in the back stock. it was on that day that i discovered the average bra and cup size is a 34B. also, on that day, i found out that when you’re being introduced to your fellow employees, sitting on a folding chair in the dimly lit stock room in the back of the store up to your elbows in bras and panties might not be the best first impression to make. people would come back, and i’d be sorting the panties left and right. i remember thinking “this is work, and i will be doing this for the rest of my life”.
one time, the lead singer of the popular local band Smashmouth came in. the store was instantly abuzz with the news that a local celebrity had entered, and many of the other employees came to see him in person. they remained away from him, looking busy, but constantly looking over because THERE was the SINGER from SMASHMOUTH. i was working at the front, by the belts section. he came up to me and said “do you have a large belt”. i sheepishly replied “yes, yes, i do” and picked out a belt that i thought might be worthy of his size, stature, and local standing.
he put on the belt and walked out of the store without paying for it.

FIRST JOBS.

my first real job was working at a pizza place when i was 16. they made me clean the bathrooms and then make the salads, in that order, and they blasted Papa Roach (as was the style at the time) in the kitchen. we never had any customers, and i quit after a week after they made me pay for my shift meal because “your suburban ass can afford it”.

my first job after the pizza place was at “The Gap”. it was a magical time filled with promise and khakis, vim and vigor, and sweatpants for twelve dollars and ninety nine cents. on the second day, they made me sort out the bras and panties in the back stock. it was on that day that i discovered the average bra and cup size is a 34B. also, on that day, i found out that when you’re being introduced to your fellow employees, sitting on a folding chair in the dimly lit stock room in the back of the store up to your elbows in bras and panties might not be the best first impression to make. people would come back, and i’d be sorting the panties left and right. i remember thinking “this is work, and i will be doing this for the rest of my life”.

one time, the lead singer of the popular local band Smashmouth came in. the store was instantly abuzz with the news that a local celebrity had entered, and many of the other employees came to see him in person. they remained away from him, looking busy, but constantly looking over because THERE was the SINGER from SMASHMOUTH. i was working at the front, by the belts section. he came up to me and said “do you have a large belt”. i sheepishly replied “yes, yes, i do” and picked out a belt that i thought might be worthy of his size, stature, and local standing.

he put on the belt and walked out of the store without paying for it.

Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 1:32pm

gpoyw.

gpoyw.

Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 12:47pm

bros.

bros.

Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 11:43am

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Download:

Bill Callahan “Too Many Birds”

Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 11:29am

this is my pick for album of the year. its so, so, so good. i wish there was a super badass funk album that i could put up instead, but i just kept coming back to this one the whole year.

this is my pick for album of the year. its so, so, so good. i wish there was a super badass funk album that i could put up instead, but i just kept coming back to this one the whole year.

Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 11:26am

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

Toots & The Mayals “54-46 Was My Number”

Wednesday, December 2nd 2009 11:22am